An Unlabeled World

By Charlie Castle

As a queer and nonbinary person, my utopia is a place with no default as to what human beings are “supposed” to be. A world without any pressure on an infant to perform a specific gender role or have a certain sexuality, whether that be heterosexual or queer. In this place, children have unlimited pathways to what they can become and won’t have to worry about coming out, fitting in, or pleasing others since no one expects anything of them to begin with anyway.

A culture that allows everyone to feel comfortable expressing themselves freely, knowing that they will be met with compassion and kindness regardless of who they are and how they want to present themselves. Where people don’t just assume someone’s gender or pronouns; with everyone using gender-neutral terms for others until they’ve been told otherwise.

On my earth, we can change our gender performance as many times as we see fit without friction or backlash; because people acknowledge that, that is all it is, a performance. A skin that reflects how we truly feel inside, which changes and grows as we go through different stages of life.

I wonder what it would be like if ‘feminine’ and ‘masculine’ were just modes of expression, instead of rigid binaries we must conform to. Imagine clothing isles categorized by color and style, rather than being divided into gendered sections. A small change which would also get rid of the anxiety and fear we sometimes experience while trying new things and getting to know ourselves better, letting us openly buy anything our heart desires without feeling the mortifying weight of being judged on our shoulders.

In this world of mine, the lines between gender and sexuality are blurred because we all recognize that every human experience is different. For instance, let’s examine me and my relationship with the two as an Agender person who identifies as Pansexual. Once I fully came to terms with my gender identity, I started to realize how I do not care about gender in general and not just concerning myself. I noticed that I do not care about my partner’s gender presentation either. Leading me to understand that I am Pansexual and not a lesbian as I had initially thought I was.

Admittedly, yes, that is more complex than we believe these things to be; which is the exact point I’m trying to make. We will never completely understand someone else’s relationship with their gender and sexuality. Nevertheless, we can and should still respect them because they are human beings who deserve compassion, no matter if the way they identify is digestible to us or not. 

My utopia is unlabeled; It’s a place for our future generations to have freedom. Where we are all just people who do not have to put ourselves in different boxes in hopes of being loved and valued. And I sincerely hope that one day, we can make this dream world a reality, so we can all finally express ourselves like we were meant to from the very beginning. 

– Charlie (they/them) is a nonbinary queer person from Iran who only recently left their country behind. They are pursuing a career in queer related NGOs since they want to help people just like them.